Acceptance Anxiety Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Confidence Decision-Making Mindful Mondays mindfulness Self-Esteem Uncategorized

Mindful Monday – August 28, 2017

“Confidence, like art, never comes from having all the answers; it comes from being open to all the questions.” – Earl Grey Stevens

Anxiety often presents itself as questions that don’t have answers. Should I have done that? What would have happened if I had made a different choice? Should I move or stay put? What’s going to happen next year? Is there an afterlife? 

It would be so comforting if questions like these had one correct answer. But they don’t. And in a way, that’s also a comfort. There is no right and wrong. There are many shades of gray, different perspectives, and unknowns. All you can do is take your best guess and be willing to adapt if necessary.

People get caught up in wanting to make the “best” choice, knowing the “right” thing to say, or being able to answer “all” the questions. But these are just ideals, and no one is attaining them. No one knows what we are doing. It doesn’t matter how much you prepare… the chances of walking up to a dartboard for the first time and hitting a bulls eye are slim to none. We are all just throwing darts, missing, adjusting our aim, and trying again.

When I was about to graduate college, I had a lot of anxiety. I felt like there was so much I still didn’t know about the world… how do you do taxes? Interview for a job? Find an apartment? Make friends outside of school? Iron a shirt? All these years later, I’ve done all of these things, and I still don’t feel like I “know how.” (Especially when it comes to taxes). I just do the best I can, and ask for help when I need it. That’s all confidence is; knowing that one way or another, you’ll figure it out.

What do you think? Comment below or e-mail me at rebeccao@kennethyoung.org. Have a mindful Monday.

-Rebecca

 

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